Tag Archives: Self-Love

Self-Love Reflections…Power Is Not Being Destroyed By Rejection -Madonna

14 Sep

I fell in love with Madonna’s reflection. It resonated with me very deeply. I found Madonna’s observation to be wise and powerful. We are taught since childhood that the love others give us {or don’t give us} defines us. We are enslaved with a hunger for validation. What a challenge it is to emancipate yourself from this invisible slavery. {Social media has only exacerbated this problem}.

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Rejection manifests itself in a myriad of ways. Being told you are not loved is the most obvious. Being shown you are not loved is more insidious. I cannot discern which is more damaging. Whatever the situation is, rejection can haunt you- especially in childhood. Unfortunately, children tend to internalize rejection and take it personally.

Being rejected really tests your capacity to love yourself. Is receiving someone’s love a litmus test of your self-worth? Who gets to decide if you are “good enough?” Does rejection mean there is something inherently wrong with you? Are you going to throw your power away and shrink from rejection? It is so seductive to reject yourself because someone else did. {Did I mention how much it deeply hurts you- your heart, soul, ego, etc?}.

The aforementioned used to be my response as I misinterpreted rejection’s painful meaning. I would reject myself because someone else did. Fortunately or unfortunately, I have met rejection’s gaze many times and am learning from the confrontations. Now I see rejection as a test of self-love/self-worth/self-esteem/self-respect and an opportunity to build resilience.

I have broken away from those old toxic paradigms and I am healing those childhood wounds. Being rejected simply means that I am not that person’s cup of tea. There is nothing more to do than to move on. There is no need to try to convince the person of your value. If they don’t know what you are worth then that is your answer.

Walk away with your dignity intact.

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Further Research

Madonnahttps://www.madonna.com/

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Peace & Self-Love,

-V.

Reflection for today…Never The Same Love Twice -F. Scott Fitzgerald

10 Jan

Isn’t it comforting to know that someone will never find the pure love that you gave them {no matter who they are with}? This reflection is so empowering to me. I feel that it highlights the importance of self-love and valuing oneself.

What you offer another in the realm of love is sacred.

If someone doesn’t value or appreciate your love then they are not the person for you. You will only suffer by their side and become embittered. You will only be taken for granted. You will not grow spiritually/evolve or live your potential. You won’t be happy or loved.

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Please enjoy Don’t Take Your Love Away From Me by VAST {Visual Auditory Sensory Theater}…

{I love how she walks away from him in the end…}

 

Https%3a%2f%2fimages

Don’t Take Your Love Away From Me

Vast

DON’T TAKE YOUR LOVE AWAY FROM ME LYRICS

I am looking for an inspiration
And I think I found it in your heart
It’s the kind of thing you get when you’re not looking
It’s the kind of thing you had from the start
Put me on a ship that is sinking
On a voyage to an untamed land
Take away the freedoms I wanted
I understand
Please, don’t take your love away from me
Don’t take your love away from me
Please don’t take your love away from me
Please don’t take your love from me
Please don’t take your love from me
Put me inside flesh that is dying
A ghost that wanders without rest
Buried by desires and weakness
I understand
Please, don’t take your love away from me
Don’t take your love away from me
Please don’t take your love from me
Please don’t take your love from me
Hmmmmmm
Hmmmmmm

 

Copied & Pasted from https://genius.com/Vast-dont-take-your-love-away-from-me-lyrics

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I have always dreamed of someone loving me like John Crosby does in this song.

The way he sings is so soulful and romantic.

He really doesn’t want his lover to leave-he aches for her.

May we all find a love like this. May we all love someone that loves us like this.

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Do you like VAST’s music?

They are criminally underrated. 

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Peace & Sacred Love,

-V.

Reflection for today…Respect Yourself -Don Miguel Ruiz & Björk

5 Jan

“Everyone has a price, and life respects that price.

But that price is not measured in dollars or in gold;

It is measured in love.

More, than that, it is measured in self-love.

How much you love yourself–that is your price–

and life respects the price.

When you love yourself, your price is very high,

which means your tolerance for self-abuse is very low.

It’s very low because you respect yourself.”

Don Miguel Ruiz, Wisdom From The Mastery of Love

I Am Nobody's Bitch 001

When I was a child my mother taught me to respect people. What she didn’t tell me is that you need to have boundaries so that people will respect you. Not only do you have to have boundaries but you have to strictly enforce them as well.

I used to be so afraid of confrontations and of speaking up. I would always worry that I might upset, hurt or offend someone. To an extent, I was also afraid of being disliked and rejected. Since I did not like myself, I was so hungry for other people’s approval {even though I did not consciously know it at the time}.

The price of this silence was putting up with some disrespect. I would be lying if I said that I didn’t regret it because I deeply regret it. I also have to acknowledge that without these experiences, then I would not have come to these realizations.

They are lessons that I am still learning and life only keeps offering you more tests.

Being “nice” is an invitation for people to test your boundaries. These days, I would much rather have respect than just be a “nice” person. It seems like a universal law that unless you respect yourself then no one truly will.

Another thing that I learned is that some people do not deserve your respect or your presence in their lives. Please let me clarify what I mean. Everyone deserves basic respect as human beings. The respect that I am speaking about is the respect that people earn through their friendship, loyalty and compassion. Some people just do not deserve that level of respect from you. Some people do not deserve your friendship, loyalty and compassion.

Trust and respect need to be earned for them to hold any gravitas/weight.

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Please enjoy Army of Me by Bjork…

Lyrics

Army of Me

Björk

[Verse 1]
“Stand up
You’ve got to manage
I won’t sympathize
Anymore
[Chorus]
And if you complain once more
You’ll meet an army of me
And if you complain once more
You’ll meet an army of me

[Verse 2]
You’re alright
There’s nothing wrong
Self-sufficience, please!
And get to work

[Chorus]
And if you complain once more
You’ll meet an army of me
And if you complain once more
You’ll meet an army of me, army of me

[Verse 3]
You’re on your own now
We won’t save you
Your rescue squad
Is too exhausted

[Chorus]
And if you complain once more
You’ll meet an army of me
And if you complain once more
You’ll meet an army of me

[Chorus]
And if you complain once more
You’ll meet an army of me
And if you complain once more
You’ll meet an army of me, army of me.”

Copied & Pasted from https://genius.com/Bjork-army-of-me-lyrics

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Love & Respect,

-V.

Reflection for today…Radiate Boundless Love -Buddha & Richard Ashcroft

6 Jan

“Radiate boundless love towards the entire world 

— above, below, and across

— unhindered, without ill will, without enmity.”

– The Buddha

(From the Metta Sutta)

richard ashcroft leave me high

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Please enjoy Leave Me High by Richard Ashcroft…

 

Richard Ashcroft’s angelic voice feels like such a healing vibration. I truly feel his soul radiating boundless love. Listening to the beauty of this song brings me to the point of tears. Richard is indeed blessed with such a gift and talent. Through his art, he is able to contribute to the healing of the world {like other artists}.

In Leave Me High, Richard says that “no love can fulfill like this love that you give.” He isn’t specifically talking about a lover in a typical romantic sense {although he could be}. Another possibility is that he is referencing self-love; where no one else can complete you or fulfill you like your own love can.

The idea of self-love as a source of spiritual strength and healing is discussed at length in the mastery of love by Don Miguel Ruiz. Self-love is the key to happiness and peace in our relationships with others and ourselves. For Don Miguel Ruiz, self-love is non-negotiable because it is so married to respect. It is the key ingredient for a spiritually and emotionally fulfilled life.

Humans hunt for love. We feel that we need that love because we believe we don’t have love, because we don’t love ourselves. We hunt for love in other humans just like us, expecting to get love from them when these humans are in the same condition as we are. They don’t love themselves either, so how much love can we get from them? We merely create a bigger need that isn’t real; we keep hunting and hunting, but in the wrong place, because other humans don’t have the love we need.” 

 

I suspect that Richard is referring to God or a universal/higher power where no one can fulfill him like this divine love does. He sings, …”leave me high, leave me looking over mountains in the heavens…”. The song has a spiritual vibe to me and love is equated with ascension and enlightenment, “your love take me higher, bring me light, everything.”

The main thesis to me is “take those chains from your heart and soul.” In essence, Richard is speaking about emancipation but from what? I think the chains are the walls that we keep to protect our hearts.  We can become imprisoned by all the ways that we try to protect ourselves from pain, loss/grief, suffering and betrayal. By wearing armour on our hearts and souls, we risk missing out on real intimacy, love and healing. It is much wiser to listen to Richard and “take those chains from your heart and soul…”

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What is your interpretation of this song?

I am by no means right or wrong.

I just thought it would be fun to try to interpret it.

 

Have you read the mastery of love?

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Lyrics

“Leave me high
Leave me looking
Leave me low
Leave me warm
No love can fulfill
Like this love that you give
Leave me high
Leave me looking
Over mountains in the heavens
No love can fulfill
Like this love that you give

Hello, hello, hello, hello
Yeah, hello, hello, hello, hello

Wasted moments come together
Like a boat on a stream
Your love take me higher
Bring me light, everything
Oh take those chains from within my soul
Like a slow train moving my soul on
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Take those chains from your heart and soul
Like a slow train moving my soul on

Hello, hello, hello, hello

Take those chains from your heart and soul
Like a slow train moving my soul on
Take those chains from your heart and soul
Yeah like a slow train
Take those chains from your heart and soul
Yeah like a slow train
Take those chains from your heart and soul
Yeah like a slow train 
Take those chains from your heart and soul
Like a slow train moving my soul on
Through the mountains over heavens
Take those chains from your heart and soul
Yeah like a slow train
Take those chains from your heart and soul
Through the mountains over heavens
Through the mountains over heavens
Leave me high
Leave me looking.”

https://www.richardashcroftonline.com/lyrics/leavemehigh.html

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For more information…

Buddha….https://www.iep.utm.edu/buddha/

https://www.lionsroar.com/who-was-the-buddha/

https://www.diamondway-buddhism.org/buddhism/buddha/

Richard Ashcroft…http://richardashcroft.com/

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCe4D66kzmrI3TI2gPz6WjTw

https://www.facebook.com/richardashcroft/

https://twitter.com/richardashcroft?ref_src=twsrc%5Egoogle%7Ctwcamp%5Eserp%7Ctwgr%5Eauthor

The Mastery of Love Book…https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/81939.The_Mastery_of_Love

Don Miguel Ruiz…http://www.miguelruiz.com/

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Peace & Healing Love…

Reflection for today…The Power of Compassion -Dalai Lama

15 Apr
“If a person has never encountered love towards himself or herself from any quarter, it is a very sad thing.
But if that person can meet even one person who will show unconditional love– simply acceptance and compassion — 
if he knows that he is an object of someone else’s affection and love, 
it is bound to have an impact, and this will be appreciated.
Because there is a seed in himself, this act of love will start to catalyse or ripen that seed.”
For more information on the Dalai Lama, please visit his official website…http://www.dalailama.com/

Reflection for today…Respect Your Love -Jimi Hendrix

12 Feb

“Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts.

Don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.” 
Jimi Hendrix

Jimi Hendrix: A Sensitive Soul…

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This valentines day don’t get seduced by fabricated love and consumerist “romantic” marketing- in other words…fake love.

Remember…

You deserve all of someone’s heart- not just a tattered and bruised corner.

You deserve the universe- not mere crumbs.

You deserve the highest respect, reverence and compassion.

You don’t need to fight to get someone’s attention or love.

If they love you and care about you, they will give it willingly.

There will be no need for convincing.

They will see you and know who you are.

They will accept who you are without question.

They will look for you.

They will find you.

They will call you or write you and not wait for you to chase them.

They will take the initiative and make the effort if they really care.

They will swim shark infested waters- or at least the ocean.

They will climb mountains, slay dragons, go to hell and get out of hell to find you.

They will visit you in the hospital or jail- if they are brave enough they might even help you break out.

They will give you their kidney if necessary.

Remember that love is shown in actions and not hollow words.

Remember that love is loyalty and loyalty is love.

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There is a huge difference between a heart of gold and a gold-plated one.

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Please enjoy …

Chris Cornell- Arms Around Your Love…

Chris Cornell- Arms Around Your Love Official Video…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yu01eOXABBg

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KMGtZnuE1Vc

“With his arms around your love
Oh no, here comes the pain that you can’t ignore

With his arms around your girl
He’ll do all of the things you didn’t do before
You had every chance, but you closed the door

[Chorus]
Now you’re just gonna have to take it
(‘Cause if you didn’t  know)
She’s gonna make you pay for it
(Price you can’t afford)
You’re  just gonna have to take it
With his arms around your love [Repeat: x3]

Oh, yeah

Pretend that you don’t mind
But you know everything that you left behind

And it would have been alright
If you’d gave half of  the praise that you held inside
You thought she’d hang around for the ride

[Chorus]

Coming clean feels so dangerous
Just a little bit would have been enough
But you never said all the words caught in your head

As if your heart was dead
Well now its surely bled and broken up

And it would have been alright
If you’d gave half of the praise that you held inside
You thought she’d hang around for the ride

[Chorus]

(Take it) With his arms around your love
(Pay for it) With his arms around your love
With his arms around your love
With his arms around your love.”

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For more information…

Jimi Hendrix…http://www.jimihendrix.com/us/home

Chris Cornell…http://chriscornell.com/home/

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Sending you seeds of self-love, self-respect and dignity…

Peace & Namaste…

Reflection for today…Love Yourself -Buddha

30 Jul

“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.”

-Buddha

Reflection for today…Love and Respect -Don Miguel Ruiz

18 Jul

If someone is not treating you with love and respect,

it is a gift if they walk away from you.

If that person doesn’t walk away, you will surely endure many years of suffering with him or her.

Walking away may hurt for a while, but your heart will eventually heal.

Then you can choose what you really want.

You will find that you don’t need to trust others as much as you need to trust yourself to make the right choices.

-Don Miguel Ruiz

The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom

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The Four Agreements is a valued reference book for me and many others.

I always come back to its wisdom and simplistic teachings as life always presents new lessons and challenges.

For more information on author Don Miguel Ruiz, please click on this link: http://www.miguelruiz.com/

*Please note that there is a companion book to the four agreements for those that want to do further inner work.

It is called The Four Agreements Companion Book: Using the Four Agreements to Master the Dream of Your Life.

There is also a fifth agreement book that expands on the four agreements.

It is called The Fifth Agreement: A Practical Guide to Self-Mastery.

Don Miguel Ruiz also has a blog.

Please click this link if you are interested: http://www.miguelruiz.com/blog/

Peace & Namaste…

Reflection for today…Love Song -Jean Grae

8 Jul

Jean Grae is one of the best lyricists/MCs that I have heard.

Jean Grae Is The Phoenix Rising From The Ashes…

Her gift of story telling is evident in every song.

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Please enjoy Love Song by Jean Grae…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hrWL7ieIU7A

This song is not only about love in relation to others but in regards to one’s self.

Self-love is what was born of deep pain.
  The protagonist in the song starts from being a naive victim and then transforms into a heroine. 

She comes from a place of dependence and grows into independence.

My favourite line is, “What I thought was gold was only gold-plated…
 How many times have you met someone who you thought had a heart of gold only to discover otherwise; hence, the gold-plated reference.

*How rare it is to find a heart of gold in this world…but it’s not impossible.

Don’t forget that you can have a heart of gold ;).

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Love Song Lyrics

“She grew up believing in passion and love
Whose folks divorced and remarried
Very naive
 Seen life and commitments that shoulda been dead and buried
Highly sentimental
Sensitive
Gentle beyond the point she should be
What might be obvious to most, she says they too bitter
Can’t see the world the way she does
Clean lungs, undamaged liver
Sees thugs through a pink-tinted glasses
Occasionally
Weed does make her giggle
Listen to some music closer
Dudes approach her
Lightly
Wanna be her lover and she obliges
Likes to cuddle under the covers by candlelit fires
Oblivious to lying schemes to talk her out of clothes
Says she’s just in love with love
Cuts her classes
Spending too much time entrancing romancing
Things are changing quickly
She’s asking “why aren’t you spending more time with me?”
 N****’s eyes are getting shifty
Coming over later smelling of pussy
On his face, jeans, and sweaters something’s fishy
And it’s not what he tells her, man, it’s what he don’t
And she don’t understand and for some years, she probly won’t

Just wants an honest man
For goodness sake
They backstabbing and cutting her throat
 Restraining orders follow, but she still optimistic about it
 Like Annie, thinking tomorrow will maybe be a better day
 I let her pray on bended knees “ask him to send prince charming, please”
She’s never cheated
Treats her man well
Cooks, cleans, dresses sexy for him
Halter tops and tight jeans
Would break the law for him
Go through a couple of these relationships
Still stays strong
She’s too young and dumb to call it quits

Learns that she carrying twice
Scared and afraid the first time
 The second she don’t even cry
Makes her wipe away his tears and it hurts
They always leave return crazy, so she doesn’t flirt
Spends time warning the babies
Goes through a couple of these relationships and still stays strong
Too young and dumb to call it quits
Its still a love song

Shes got a good man
Shes 19, he’s 21 and sweet and honest
Promised to love her
Talk of marriage
She would never wanna be somebody’s baby’s mother
Use rubbers occasionally
When she’s flowing
Open to all the affection and gifts and all the good manners he’s showing
He’s trying to build a life for himself
Studies late computer shit and she’s missing attention that she’s not getting
Sex dwindles
Crawling in the sheets
 He say “ya tired” and she say she feel “neglect and defeat”
Just doesn’t see his ambition
She wanna be the universe and hold his center position
Starts hanging round the best friend more
 Crazy attraction takes impulsive action
Drop the drawers
And falls in love
The world explodes
And she confesses “yeah I did it, so?”
They so tight it like he moves when she stretches
 Over the couple years
Too many stresses
Girls who wanna fight her
Bitches writing letters
Friendships disappearing
Plus he rhymes, so it’s competitive
Pressure miscarriage
They break up fifty times a week and make up just as much
 He fuckin’, and I know, but pretending I’m out of touch
It’s getting strained and gets physical
She cries until the river dries and leaves her dead and cold
Packs up her things and leaves behind what I thought was gold was only gold-plated
 Thinking of all the other ones I coulda just left and up and dated
Singled after four years
Starting over never easy
But it takes some time to realize your own worth
Come into your own
Play your mental rebirth

She starts penning some better poems
Straighten up her bank account
Likes to take herself out
I’m getting better at it
I’ve had a few relationships
But still too young and dumb enough to call it quits
It’s still a love song

Love
All I ever want is you
All I ever had, leading in my life was you
All that ever was, all I ever had

Maybe it’s easier to talk about this shit in third person
Learning better
Looking for love in all the wrong places
Like I’m Eddie Murphy
Curse me to repeat the same cycle
I’m breaking
No longer think relations make a better woman
Just for life, I’m pursuing
Growing
, but hopelessly romantic still

Tasted weather in the bitter climates
Love the sunshine better
Dreaming of dream proposals
Decent moral values placing higher on my chart
Trying not to have a shallow heart
But battle scars are deep and reaching to the depth of hell and back
Try to give up the grudges
Think it’s experience and move from the clutches of sadness
It’s difficult

Sometimes I wish I wasn’t an adult
Adolescent primetime sitcom star
I’ve been too far and too much, too hard, for too long
It’s still a love song.”
-Jean Grae

Here’s hoping that you realize your own worth and find the person that has a heart of gold {not a gold-plated one}.
Here’s to hoping you find the person that deserves you, your love, heart and soul.
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For more information on Jean Grae….
please visit: http://jeangrae.com/
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Peace & Namaste…

Reflection for today…The Warrior’s Reminder -Erykah Badu

3 Jul

The Warrior’s Reminder 

I am awake

 

My mind is free 

 
I am creative 

I love myself 

My willpower is strong
 
 I am brave
 
 I practice patience
 
I don’t judge folks
 
 I give, not to receive
 
 I don’t expect, I accept 
I listen more than I talk 
I know I’ll change 
 
I’ll hold on one more day
 
 I start over when necessary
 
 
I create my own situations 

I am cosmic  

I do not have the answers 

I desire to learn

  

I am the plan

 

I am strong 

I am weak

I want to grow 
 
I know I will
 
 I take on responsibility
 
 I hide myself from no one 

I’m on my path 

Warriors walk alone
 
I won’t let my focus change
 
Taking out the demons in my range…

-Erykah Badu

*Love You Erykah!!!

You have always been a teacher, a mentor and a true soulful artist.

You are a beautiful soul.

Namaste…


Peace & Namaste…