Tag Archives: Seduce

Self-Love Reflections…Power Is Not Being Destroyed By Rejection -Madonna

14 Sep

I fell in love with Madonna’s reflection. It resonated with me very deeply. I found Madonna’s observation to be wise and powerful. We are taught since childhood that the love others give us {or don’t give us} defines us. We are enslaved with a hunger for validation. What a challenge it is to emancipate yourself from this invisible slavery. {Social media has only exacerbated this problem}.

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Rejection manifests itself in a myriad of ways. Being told you are not loved is the most obvious. Being shown you are not loved is more insidious. I cannot discern which is more damaging. Whatever the situation is, rejection can haunt you- especially in childhood. Unfortunately, children tend to internalize rejection and take it personally.

Being rejected really tests your capacity to love yourself. Is receiving someone’s love a litmus test of your self-worth? Who gets to decide if you are “good enough?” Does rejection mean there is something inherently wrong with you? Are you going to throw your power away and shrink from rejection? It is so seductive to reject yourself because someone else did. {Did I mention how much it deeply hurts you- your heart, soul, ego, etc?}.

The aforementioned used to be my response as I misinterpreted rejection’s painful meaning. I would reject myself because someone else did. Fortunately or unfortunately, I have met rejection’s gaze many times and am learning from the confrontations. Now I see rejection as a test of self-love/self-worth/self-esteem/self-respect and an opportunity to build resilience.

I have broken away from those old toxic paradigms and I am healing those childhood wounds. Being rejected simply means that I am not that person’s cup of tea. There is nothing more to do than to move on. There is no need to try to convince the person of your value. If they don’t know what you are worth then that is your answer.

Walk away with your dignity intact.

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Further Research

Madonnahttps://www.madonna.com/

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Peace & Self-Love,

-V.

Stream of Consciousness Reflections…The Spiritual Lessons of The Pandemic…

16 Apr

Aloha dear friends/readers.

How is life treating you? I pray well.

I started this blog many years ago to reflect on life,  ideas, theories, philosophies, truths, emotions, people, the world, the inner workings of my mind, etc.

Perhaps it was also an attempt to access the locked room in my mind- my subconscious.

I have always lived a life of quiet reflection to connect more deeply with my spirituality and my self. Now I think it is the quintessential time for all of us to reflect on the life we were living and how we are living now. This pandemic and quarantine have taught us all so much. {I am aware that our lessons are tailored to each of us}.

What is still important? What remnants of the past carry over to the present? Are your ethics and priorities the same? Do you have more clarity now? Will the changes in ourselves, in others and our lives be sustainable? We will go back to how we were when this over? Hopefully, we are fluid like the ebbs and flows of the ocean. 

I am reflecting on what I am supposed to learn and the hidden lessons in the chaos.

Compassion is still the highest form of love because it is spiritual love.

Altruism exists– even though the critics/haters disagree. {Unfortunately, selfishness also exists}.

We are all interconnected. We all affect each other and in some cases, we all need each other. {Perhaps now we can see the invisible threads that unite us. The ego always works to disconnect us from each other through the illusion of seperation}. In essence, we are all waves in the same ocean of humanity.

Courage can be born out of necessity.

Health is wealth.

Reflection/inner introspection is a vital and meditative activity for your soul and mind.

Fear can seduce us into paralysis if we let it.

Creative problem-solving is vital in life.

We all need to take care of our mental health {as well as our physical health}- especially now. Depression and anxiety can slowly invite its way into our lives if we are not mindful.

People mean more to us than we realized- especially loved ones or family.

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Please enjoy Ocean by Azam Ali featuring Loga Ramin Torkia

{This song and Azam Ali’s singing gives me such peace}…

So does seeing the beautiful cinematography that showcases the exquisite beauty of Mexico.

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What are your lessons from the pandemic and quarantine?

I would love to hear them.

I hope to share more lessons in the future…

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Further Research…

Azam Alihttps://azamalimusic.com/

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Peace & Compassionate Love,

-V.

 

Karl Pilkington Reflects On The Art of Seduction in The Moaning of Life…

15 Sep

Karl Pilkington has quickly become one of my favourite comedians. I consider him to be an ultimate “truth-teller” {as most comedians are e.g. Larry David}. They shine a light on many hypocritical, controversial or hidden aspects of society and human behaviour. I have respect for comedians and their honesty. They have such keen eyes and ears for social observation and commentary. A comedian will tell it like it is. You can count on them for that.

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In this short video clip, Karl meets Vinnie the “pick-up artist”.

The results are comedic gold.

{I simply can’t get enough of Karl’s sarcastic looks when the camera catches him in action}. He is clearly not convinced by Vinnie’s seduction tactics. Hilarious!

It is truly a case of the clueless leading the confused. I truly feel compassion and pity for these men. They went to this man for guidance and wisdom {just observe them staring at Vinnie}. If anything, he simply strayed them from the path of love and authentic, soulful relating. 

Vinnie’s lack of respect for personal space and boundaries worries me. Respect is gravely missing from the equation. I totally agree with Karl when he notes, “you can’t go about just touching women!” Don’t you just love how outraged he is at this lack of respect? All men should be outraged at disrespect towards women. I think the measure of a man lies in how much he respects women {and others- including himself}. Karl is a man of integrity and is often the voice of reason. I find myself agreeing with him all the time.

An example of Karl’s solid logic is his response to Vinnie’s approach to seducing women. Karl observes, “why don’t you have a chat and see what they like first?…Give them some facts. I’m interested in nature and that so give them a little nature fact or a little…you know, something that like that if they go, “why are you talking about nature for you boring ****” and walks off then I didn’t want to go out with you anyway. If you don’t like nature then**** off.” Karl’s philosophy is to be authentic and if Karl Pilkington is anything he is the epitome of honesty and authenticity.

I love that Karl knows no hypocrisy. He probably doesn’t have a false bone in his body. His approach is to be real and I think more people should adopt this way of relating. I am a person that likes to know where I stand with people. I don’t have the desire or the energy to pretend to like someone or something when I don’t. Your life energy/chi/prana is sacred and I don’t think it should be prostituted in being false. Isn’t it a tragedy that so often people don’t know who they are before old age or death? Why not go within on the greatest journey of self-discovery? {I digress because I am going on a tangent}.

Karl’s authenticity is in direct opposition to Vinnie false pretense of seduction. Vinnie is playing a role. He is acting but who is the real Vinnie? We know exactly who the real Karl is and I deeply appreciate this. In my humble opinion, Vinnie has got it all wrong. His aim is to touch a woman physically and this approach is a disservice to women. It is so reductive because it shrinks women into a sole object of sexual desire, nothing more and nothing less. In this paradigm, women’s identities are fractured and their intelligence is dissolved- or at least obscured from the dialogue.

Most women would love it if a man would be attracted to their mind as well as their body. By only focusing on the body, Vinnie is creating a schism between the body and the mind. He clearly doesn’t know that the intellectual and creative realms are very sexual {i.e. “intelligence is sexy“}. If he really wanted to appeal to women, then he would teach these men to appeal to their minds, hearts and souls. In essence, his approach to seduction is boring because women are more intelligent and complex than he leads these poor men to believe. {Most women will also enforce their boundaries}.

I cannot give Vinnie any of credit for pretending to be interested in what women have to say. His false sense of interest does nothing to convince any woman that he actually cares about what they think or feel. I just get the feeling that he is always planning the next move as if he is in a game of sexual chess. Even his line of “the desert fascinates me” sounds like b.s. His declaration of “social freedom” is so ridiculous that it sounds like a comedy sketch in itself {a parody}. Is Vinnie claiming that social freedom exists when men can touch women at their leisure? I certainly hope not.

My conclusion is that the lady or Karl should be teaching the class on being attractive to women. Karl may not have any “chat-up/pick-up lines” but he knows how to listen to and relate to women; hence he knows how to respect women. Chat-up/pick-up lines are cheesy, to say the least. Authenticity will get you much further than any recycled and contrived chat up/pick up lines will. Karl has the alchemical gold that is missing from Vinnie’s lecture- respect for women.

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What do you think about Karl Pilkington, Vinnie the pick-up artist and the moaning of life episode on marriage?

I would love to hear your thoughts.

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For more information…

Karl Pilkington…http://www.karlpilkington.com/

The Moaning of Life TV Series…http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3277670/

Karl Pilkington The Moaning of Life

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Peace & Comedic Love…

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Reflection for today…Deconstructing Happiness -Karl Pilkington

2 Aug

*This post is dedicated to my friend Olly who is the biggest Karl Pilkington fan that I know.

Karl Pilkington is a critical thinker.

Karl Loves To Think Outside The Box…

Part of Karl’s mass appeal is that he stays true to himself. Despite his massive success, Karl seems to still be authentic. He is always honest, curious, humble and so funny. He is best known as comedian Ricky Gervais’ friend and colleague on their very successful podcasts The Ricky Gervais Show. He was the star of an idiot abroad and even wrote a diary about his adventures. His latest creative endeavour is the moaning of life.

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In this short video clip Karl deconstructs happiness in relation to physical beauty/fitness.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WnoIj624Wf8

Happiness | The Moaning of Life | Karl Pilkington

For the moaning of life, he meets a man who has had 120 procedures and approximately $150,000 worth of plastic surgeries. Karl posed without his shirt next to the man who’s had all the plastic surgeries. The interviewer says to Karl, “I am quite impressed with that you don’t care. You are happy to stand there posing with your top off. And let’s face it, you haven’t the best body known to man.”

I love Karl’s humble yet refreshing attitude in response to the interviewer. He replies that his body is “not a bad one…it works. But I understand that any women watching this wouldn’t go…oh, look at him. But that’s the reality isn’t it? That’s what most people look like.” Why is Karl’s physique so unattractive or unacceptable?? I don’t think it is by any means. It’s a manner of perception and what we are being sold {in an ideological sense i.e. perfection}. Most people prefer fantasy and illusion instead of truth. Karl Pilkington is the ultimate realist and he employs his critical thinking skills to deconstruct the situation.

Karl inquisitively asks, “So I don’t know what’s happened where they think that’s normal on the left.” Adverting has sent people on a relentless quest for perfection, beauty/sex appeal and youth. Men are now being attacked with similar psychological warfare that women are attacked with {albeit to a much lesser degree}. Even children are being groomed as consumers.

We are reduced to our exterior appearances- not even amounting to the sum of our parts. In the mainstream media, what we look like has solely defined who we are. Our rich inner life, emotions, intellect, spirituality have been erased from the discourse and divorced from our identities. I wonder what consequences this emotional and spiritual disconnection will bring. We cannot allow society, marketing/advertising to dictate to us who we are. Your self identity needs to be your own creation because only you know who you are inside.

The ridiculous new plastic surgery that Karl mentions is testicle ironing. What has happened to people that they need to invent these new procedures? Are they really that bored or obsessed with unattainable perfection? Why don’t people focus on true problems in humanity: poverty; hunger; war; abuse to children, animals, women, the environment; human trafficking; genital mutilation; acid attacks; rapes; racism, sexism, discrimination of all types; social inequality, etc? I always wonder what great things people could accomplish in their personal lives {and humanity as a whole} if we wouldn’t be seduced by this culture of narcissism and distraction.

Will people wake up to their own power in order to enact change in their lives and in the context of the world? Will most remain asleep? Time will tell but hopefully more will realize this matrix is a prison {if we chose to stay enslaved in it}. It is time to wake up and realize that emancipation from society’s brainwashing is in our hands. We hold the key. This quest for perfection, endless youth and eternal beauty is a social construction and an illusion.

No one will argue against self-care as caring about one’s health and appearance is quite healthy. The danger lies in caring too much because it can distract you from more important things in life that are more deserving of your time, energy and attention. Focusing obsessively on such trivial and vain things such as perfection seems like such a waste of energy, time, money and human potential but that’s just my opinion. As Karl says, “don’t worry about it.”

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Do you agree or disagree with Karl Pilkington?

Why or why not?

{I hope to feature more moaning of life clips and Karl Pilkington in the near future}.

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Please enjoy Clutching at Straws by Andrea Parker {from her Kiss My Arp cd}….

{I was lucky enough to see her in person when she opened up for Radiohead. It was divine and I loved her music}.

I copied this from her biography page…

“”Known as no1darker – Parker has always been uncompromising, passionate about the music and loaded with don’t–give-a-shit resolve. She has a love of art, arps, photography, architecture, graffiti, 808, concrete, glaciers, adidas, Bass, rust and all things white.  She is incredibly hard to pigeon hole : one minute she will be in the studio making dark, menacing, haunting music-  going from Booty shakin’ beats to string drenched ballads. The next she’ll be climbing mountains and reaching new summits; from Kilimanjaro in Africa to the avenue of the volcanoes in Ecuador.  She has worked for many charity’s, including Crisis, the NSPCC, Get kids going and many more, she even dressed up as Pudsey Bear for Children in Need!!  An old school analogue girl at heart, she still remains a die hard B Girl and is defiantly a freaky B*tch! One things for sure: She’d give the men in white coats a run for their money if they even dared think about taking her away…”

-Time Out magazine

“Beats so phat, so dope and so dark, there ain’t a NYC MC alive (cept maybe Rakim) that could handle them”

-New York Times

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=40JbtBCjz1U&feature=share

Knowing our self
Who we think that we are
Constantly changing
Constantly changing
So near and so far
Knowing ourself
Who we think that we are
Constantly changing
Constantly changing
So near and so far
Who we think that we are
Who we think that we are
Who we think that we are.”

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For more information…

Karl Pilkington…http://www.karlpilkington.com/ 

http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1797453/

The Moaning of Life…http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3277670/ 

Andrea Parker…http://www.andreaparker.co.uk/ 

http://www.andreaparker.co.uk/about-andrea

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Peace & Namaste…

Tricky Reflects On The Seductive Powers Of Ego…

27 Jan

Tricky/Adrian Thaws is an artist that is unequivocal.

He has no peer.

Tricky is a Humble Musical Genius…

He was one of the original members of Massive Attack and he is credited along with them for inventing the genre of trip hop {although it is a label that he rejects}.

In this video clip, Tricky reflects on the seductive powers of ego.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ebQ9nQmiRuY

Tricky disregards music critics and writers but instead embraces his listeners. He has disdain for the term “fan” as it is derived from the word fanatic. Tricky feels that it is derogatory; instead, he calls them like-minded people. For Tricky it is his listeners that really matter. He says a lot of what guides his career is a dedication to his listeners.

Tricky calls what music critics write as forgettable, disposable and devoid of meaning as “his music will still be there after the magazine has faded and gone.” He concludes that music criticism is not really real. {Any loyal Tricky listener will notice the connection to his songs “for real” and “really real”}.

Ego is a very dangerous element for Tricky. He observes,

Ego is a very dangerous thing to play around with. Ego will get you quicker than coke, quicker than heroine, quicker than drugs, drink…In this business, it’s all those things. You got cocaine, you got heroine, you got alcohol, self-abuse…Everybody knows what they can do to an artist. The ego is just as dangerous as all of those…When you start to take yourself too seriously…

What I always remember…now it is my turn and one day no one’s going to be interested in what I’m doing and there’s going to someone else…there’s going to be a new Tricky. There’s going to be a new kid that someone’s talking about. I’m going to be a has been…an artist of back then. I’m going to be an old school artist. I might still have people that are in to what I’m doing but the interest is not going to be there. Every dog has his day. So it’s just short-term now, appreciate it and better hope you got something else to go on to because you can’t stay in the limelight. You can’t stay a now person. You can’t be the in person.

When I’m 50, whatever people think about me, if I, people will say if I changed the face of music. That aint’ going to matter. You know what I mean? It’s going to be someone else who changes the face of music or what people write about. You can’t really take yourself too seriously. You got to have fun. You got to feel like you’re lucky… I could be out there doing construction work. I could have a job where I get up at four, five o’clock in the morning and work on the road all day. That’s a hard job. Now I go around the world doing press and playing shows.

Ego don’t come into it…”

It is this gratitude that sets Tricky apart as he completely removes ego from the equation. His humility and work ethos are so refreshing in this age of ego and narcissism. I completely respect Tricky, his music and his philosophy. I have been an admirer and listener of his music for so many years. Tricky’s music has been a continuous healing soundtrack in my life. His music continues to sing to my soul and like any timeless love affair, I can honestly say that this love has only intensified with time. I deeply appreciate Tricky’s music/art, talent and humility. I am always fascinated to know more about Adrian Thaws, the brilliant yet humble man behind the artist Tricky.

*Happy birthday Tricky!!!

I love and respect you, your music/art more than ever.

Please keep creating more.

Thank you from the depths of my soul.

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Please enjoy Nothing’s Changed by Tricky & Francesca Belmonte

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xSpmnjbomx0

Tricky performs Nothing’s Changed featuring Francesca Belmonte –

“Success has got nothing to do with happiness…”

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For more information…

Tricky…http://www.trickysite.com/

Francesca Belmonte…http://francescabelmonte.co.uk/

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Peace & Namaste….

Reflection for today…The Consequences of Technology -Doris Lessing

18 Sep

“A foolhardy lot, we accepted it all, as we always do, never asked:

“What is going to happen to us now, with this invention of print?”

In the same way, we never thought to ask,

“How will our lives, our way of thinking, be changed by the internet, which has seduced a whole generation with its inanities so that even quite reasonable people will confess that, once they are hooked, it is hard to cut free, and they may find a whole day has passed in blogging etc?” 
— Doris Lessing

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The irony is not lost on me that I am using the internet to communicate to you and you are using it to read this post. I am also not saying that the internet is exactly the matrix.

I simply liked this quote because it questions how the internet has changed our lives. Of course, it has changed our lives for the better. I love blogging as much as the next person. You can research anything you want at the touch of a few computer keys. You can communicate with people all over the world. You can buy things online, etcetera.

We also need to analyze the negative ways the internet has changed our lives so that we can find a healthy balance online and offline.

Peace & Namaste…

Reflection for today…The Seduction of Consumerism -Chuck Palahniuk

28 Aug

“Are these things really better than the things I already have?

Or am I just trained to be dissatisfied with what I have now?” 

― Chuck PalahniukLullaby

Art by Barbara Kruger

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This incisive quote reminds me of Chuck Palahniuk’s other novel Fight Club which was made into an enlightening film called Fight Club– one of my favourite films. 

{I highly recommend watching Fight Club because of the acidic social commentary, intriguing story and excellent acting}.

Here is the trailer in case you are interested:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SUXWAEX2jlg

In essence, Chuck Palahniuk is alluding to commodity fetishism. The term that Karl Marx invented to describe how commodities are being fetishized and given an intrinsic value. It analyzes how the means of production and the relationships between consumers and workers are being obscured. {I apologize for the poor definition but I hope to elaborate on this in future posts}.

This quote asks us to re-consider our consumerist urges and desires.

Why do I really want a new thing?

Do I really need it?

Or do I simply just want it?

Why do I want it?

Do I just have a materialist itch to scratch?

Is there actually anything wrong with the one I have or am I just getting caught up in the consumerist zeitgeist?

These are questions we can ask ourselves…

Peace & Namaste…

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For more information on…

The author Chuck Palahniuk…http://chuckpalahniuk.net/

Fight Club the bookhttp://chuckpalahniuk.net/books/fight-club

Fight Club the film on the Internet Movie Database

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0137523/

Banksy, the mysterious and elusive graffiti artist

http://www.banksy.co.uk/