Tag Archives: Painful

Psychoanalysis As Archaeology in Penny Dreadful

14 May

Dedicated to O…

Freud famously described psychoanalysis as archaeology, the unearthing of meaning layered deep beneath an “expanse of ruins.

In television and movies it’s closer to a detective story.”

https://www.nytimes.com/2008/01/28/arts/television/28stan.html

Penny Dreadful Dr Seward & Vanessa Ives

In their first meeting, Vanessa Ives {Eva Green} and Dr.Seward {Patti LuPone} explore the intimate relationship between {potential} patient and psychologist.

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This brilliant scene from Penny Dreadful illustrates how a alienist/psychologist/therapist/psychiatrist excavates the truth through words, gestures/body language, actions, etc. Although it is the first time that Vanessa Ives and Dr.Seward meet, the alienist sets her boundaries. Since it is a preliminary consultation, she has to assess if Vanessa will be her patient {“if I take your case”}. 

Vanessa’s gestures are psychoanalyzed {why are you scratching your hand? Why were you doing that?}. Vanessa replies shyly that she had an itch. Dr.Seward says “no, you didn’t” with conviction. To Dr.Seward, the scratching of the hand is not as it appears; it connotes nervousness/anxiety. Every gesture speaks volumes to the alienist/psychologist/psychiatrist

Vanessa sees Dr.Seward’s observations as a challenge. She says, “this is a challenge. You’ll see if I am worthy of study.” Her astute observations about Dr.Seward’s criteria are accurate. Through prelimiary psychoanalysis, the therapist is trying to assess if Vanessa is worthy of her time, energy and talents. Is she worth having as a patient?

Dr.Seward warns Vanessa, “I am not your friend or your priest or your husband. I am your doctor. You come to me to get better because you are ill- no other reason. Do you understand that?” She sets her professional boundaries clearly. The purpose of therapy is to heal Vanessa of her illness.

Dr.Seward’s compassion shines through despite her tough demeanor. She asks Vanessa, do you understand that you are ill- not bad, not unworthy- just ill? Depression often tricks a person into thinking that they are unworthy. It tells many lies. The therapist must convince the patient of their depressed state instead of internalizing a depressed identity.

She resassures Vanessa that there are “no emotions unwelcome in this room.” Vanessa is encouraged to release her emotions because it is cathartic to do so. Dr.Seward is also communicating to Vanessa that she will not be judged. She is free to speak and express herself as necessary. She also warns her, “if this process doesn’t appeal to you, the door is there.” It almost sounds like she is testing Vanessa or interrogating her at times.

The turning point is when Vanessa takes control of the narrative. She says with a smile, “you don’t want me to leave…because I scratch my hand. You find that telling…those phobias that interest you.” She assures the doctor that she might interest her as a patient. Vanessa notes that Dr.Seward doesn’t need the ten shillings but she does need interesting people to collect. Dr.Seward disagree with her by saying that she takes patients on to cure them. Vanessa asks, what the difference is between collecting and curing?

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This scene is when Dr.Seward really showcases her talents as the skilled alienist. She ends her analsysis with the metaphor of the ouroboros. {The snake eating its tail is a symbol of infinity}. In essence, Dr.Seward is telling Vanessa that she is trapped in an endless cycle of unhappiness as she constantly tortures herself.

12 Monkeys End At The Beginning

The ouroboros from the 12 Monkeys television series from Syfy

Dr. Seward (to Vanessa Ives):

“I already know what’s wrong with you.

You’re unhappy. You’re isolated.

You think you’re the cause of this unhappiness and are unworthy of affection so you’ve few friends.

Recently you lost something you think very important- your lover, your faith, your family, or all three.

You blame yourself for this, so it makes you neurotic and you don’t sleep and don’t eat anything healthy anyway.

You used to take care of your appearance, but you’ve lost interest in that, so you avoid mirrors.

Sunlight bothers you, so you avoid that too, about which you’re guilty because you think it’s unhealthy and even immoral not to like the sun.

You’re not a woman of convention or you wouldn’t be here, but you like to pretend you are so people don’t notice you.

But you sometimes like that as well, and can dress to draw the eye. But then you think the men who look at you are fools, or worse, to be taken in by such an obvious outward show.

So, instead you’re drawn to dark, complicated, impossible men, assuring your own unhappiness and isolation because, after all, you’re happiest alone.

But not even then because you can’t stop thinking about what you’ve lost, again, for which you blame yourself.

So the cycle goes on, the snake eating its own tail.”

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I highly recommend watching Penny Dreadful.

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These scenes convey the brilliant acting of Eva Green, Patti LuPone and the work of the creative teams behind Penny Dreadful. It also highlights the emancipating insight that one can gain from psychotherapy. I have been in psychotherapy and it is one of the best decisions I have made. The internal work is so challenging and often painful but it is worth it in terms of healing, personal development, self-discovery, growth, etc. I highly recommend it.

The key is being ready to open yourself up to examine your memory palace/the locked rooms in your mind and finding the right alienist/psychologist/therapist for you.

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P.s. I plan to do posts about the television shows Penny Dreadful; 12 Monkeys; the alienist; etc.

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Further Research…

Penny DreadfulPenny Dreadful’s Internet Movie Database Page

Eva Green..Eva Green’s Internet Movie Database Page

Patti LuPonePatti LuPone’s Internet Movie Database Page

12 Monkeys12 Monkey’s Internet Movie Database Page

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Peace & Psychoanalytic Love,

V.

The Art of Listening In HBO’s In Treatment…

12 May

Listening is truly a lost art.

In Treatment Dr Paul Weston's Hand Gestures

How often do you encounter people in life that you can tell are obviously not listening? It is the most common experience.

Sadly, it has become rare when someone actually listens to you and values what you have to say. 

In Treatment Talk To Me

In Treatment was a half an hour drama on HBO that starred Gabriel Byrne. The show was about the art of listening, psychotherapy, dysfunctions, neuroses, ethics, fears, self-sabotage, mental illness, relationships, conflict, trauma, pain, suffering, healing, resilience, etc.

Compassion and humanity are at the root of psychotherapy and In Treatment respectively. They speak about the deep need to be listened to without judgment. I have a great respect for psychology. It was one of my areas of study and I have intuitively known it is my vocation since childhood.

In treatment was even studied in universities at the time {I am not sure if it still is}. Counselling psychology students discussed in treatment in classes. Its pedagogical purpose was to teach students how to live their potential as psychologist and to help their clients heal.

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In Treatment is like a prism that reflects the spectrum of humanity.

It can be Shakespearean in its dramatic storylines, intimate revelations and profound intellectual discussions.

{Side note: this is Paul’s wave machine in the introduction}.

It is a cerebral show that dives deep into the Alice in wonderland rabbit hole of the psyche. In treatment relies heavily on the art of acting. Gabriel and the rest of the cast really shine in this thirty-minute drama. The skilled actors play off the script, each other, emotions and body language. They have no special effects to rely on- just their acting skills. {Side note: Gabriel won a golden globe for his performance. Many other actors and the show itself were nominated for numerous awards}.

Gabriel’s character is the compassionate Dr.Paul Weston.

He is the wounded healer, secret keeper, listener, teacher and psychologist.

In Treatment He's Listening

Psychotherapy is based on trust and vulnerability- spiritual and emotional nakedness. There is a strong emotional connection between Paul and all of his patients. First, he has to earn their trust and convince them to trust him and open up.

He must analyze their issues beneath the masks they wear.

He has to discern the truth from lies, distortions and projections.

All of his patients have complex problems and dysfunctional patterns of behaviour.

Some are based on the complexities of being in a relationship and sharing a life with someone despite conflicting personalities or desires. With Jake and Amy, Paul is a mediator between them. He uses conflict resolution, helps them clarify their real issues/emotions and helps them decide on their course of action.

Others are more individual problems with roots in childhood.

Regardless of how the trauma manifests itself, what is evident is that Paul is responsible for his patients.

In some cases, he is the only person that his patients have to rely on. 

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In treatment examines many themes. One is the issue of transference.

Transference can happen in the therapeutic process. The psychologist has to maintain their boundaries and respect their professional code of ethics.

How do you treat a patient that thinks they are in love with you?

What if they insist on their declarations of love?

What if they play mind games and employ manipulation?

How do navigate that?

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Intergenerational trauma is another topic that is examined in the show.

Alex is not even aware of the impact of how his father murdered his grandfather traumatized him. He is also not conscious of how his childhood and his father’s toxic masculinity traumatized him.

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How do you deal with the emotional impact of listening to people’s problems all day?

Many psychologists go to their own psychologist for therapy and to consult about their patients. Paul goes to Gina for this purpose. Their relationship is quite strained but he desperately needs that outlet.

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Some quotes from this video stood out to me in particular…

“It is hard to see so many people in pain and not be able to do anything to help them in some way.” -Paul

“Maybe helping is easier than feeling the pain.” -Laura

I can attest to this feeling of helplessness. It is very painful for me to see or know that someone is in pain without being able to do anything to ease their suffering.

Laura’s observation has some merit. Sometimes it is easier to help than feel. Sometimes it just hurts too much.

“We are not Gods, we can’t save anybody.” -Gina

Gina’s statement is true.

We cannot save anybody.

We can only help them to save themselves.

“It is possible to live in a world where people panic, where people let each other down, where they disappoint each other but still help each other out.” -Paul

I think this is the most realistic observation.

It is still possible to help each other despite our flaws and limitations.

Paul asks Alex where he wants his therapy to lead him. He answers painfully, “some place where I feel less shitty about myself.”

There is something in Blair Underwood’s voice when he says “some place where I feel less shitty about myself.” We can all relate to this sentiment.

“I thought that is what we are on the earth for- to help each other- to step up to the plate when somebody needs us.” -Paul

I have to agree with Paul.

I think it is noble to derive your life’s purpose from altruism and compassion.

Finding meaning in helping others is something I can deeply relate to.

“There are other places where you can feel safe and here in this room is one of those places.” -Paul

The therapist’s office is like a sanctuary from the chaos of the world.

Paul really wants to help his patients find their own answers to enlighten themselves, empower themselves and solve their problems.

With Sophie, Paul wanted her to have her own epiphanies.

In this scene, Sophie has empowered herself enough to confront her father on his abandonment and absence as a father.

Paul’s role is not to be the judge but to guide them to reconnect and re-establish their relationship. The journey is painful but worthwhile.

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Paul’s observations/analysis is incisive.

He really gets to the root of his patient’s suffering.

{It reminds me of Robin Williams’ character the psychologist Sean McGuire in Goodwill Hunting}.

His patients always challenge him and often test his boundaries.

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It should be noted that Paul has his own problems to contend with.

I think it is vital to observe that psychologists are human and imperfect. They have to deal with their own life and its challenges while trying to help others heal and figure out their life’s labyrinth.

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Happy birthday to Gabriel Byrne today!!!

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Further Research

Gabriel Byrnehttps://www.byrneholics.com/

Gabriel Byrne’s Internet Movie Database Page

In TreatmentIn Treatment’s Internet Movie Database Page

In Treatment’s HBO Page

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Have you watched In Treatment?

What did you think?

You can watch it on HBO’s website {for a price}.

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Rest in peace to Irrfan Khan who recently died {April 29th, 2020}.

He brilliantly played Sunil in the third season.

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Peace & Compassion,

-V.

Welcome To Transformative & Healing 2020…

1 Jan

Esteemed Friends:

Happy New Year. I can feel that 2020 will transcend 2019.

2019 was a very painful and challenging year for me. It taught me many unforgettable lessons e.g. to keep working on self-love/self-esteem/self-worth; the importance of following my intuition and putting up/maintaining boundaries; working with my shadow side; fueling a transformation/spiritual awakening/evolution; to be more discerning about who I trust or befriend, etc.

I have been detoxing from toxicity in all of its forms (e.g. toxic people/situations/behaviours/thoughts/emotions). In the past year, I have distanced myself from a person that has a toxic and dysfunctional family {namely his evil witch sister, diabolical ex-wife and possibly his son}. They thrived on gossiping, slandering/lying, backstabbing and getting sadistic pleasure from others’ pain, etc.

They smiled in your face while they stabbed you in the back. They poisoned my friend’s mind about me and turned him against me. To be honest, they had extremely bad vibes and stole my energy (i.e. psychic vampires that dabbled in the dark arts) and I am so grateful to be away from them. 

When I used to see them at social events, they would drain my energy to the point of almost falling asleep. It would take days to recover from the energy theft. I feel so much lighter spiritually to not have their sinister presence in my life. They were so familiar with envy and jealousy that they probably invented the concept of “the evil eye.”

He really should have known better. He really should have known me and who I am at my core- my essence. He should have not been dissuaded by these jealous, evil and heartless individuals.

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This year I will continue to focus on transformation/spiritual awakening/evolution and healing. I will keep working on my shadow side, fitness, education and other projects (which includes this blog).

This post is the first post of this 2020. I am going to release any fears and judgments about my writing/thoughts/emotions. I am just going to let them flowthis is why they are called stream of consciousness reflections. It is a creative expression with minimal editing.

I close this post with So Fresh and So Clean by Outkast. Despite all that has transpired in 2019, I am choosing to start 2020 feeling so fresh and so clean. I feel my Leo fire energy giving me strength.

The phoenix rises from the ashes.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-JfEJq56IwI

So Fresh, So Clean

OutKast

SO FRESH, SO CLEAN LYRICS

[Produced by Organized Noize][Hook: André 3000]
Ain’t nobody dope as me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, cleanDon’t you think I’m so sexy? I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, cleanAin’t nobody dope as me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, cleanI love when you stare at me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean

[Verse 1: Big Boi]
Sir Lucious gots gator belts and patty melts and Monte CarlosAnd El Dorados;

 so I’m waking up out of my slumber feeling like Rollo
So follow, it’s Showtime at the Apollo minus the Kiki ShepardsWhat about a ho in a leopard-print? Ah


Teddy Pendergrass, cooler than Freddie JacksonSipping a milkshake in a snowstorm


Left her throat warm in the dorm room at the A.U
We blew hay too, athletes might cake youBut you must have me mistaken with them statements that you make ’cause

[Hook: André 3000]
Ain’t nobody dope as me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, cleanDon’t you think I’m so sexy? I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, cleanAin’t nobody dope as me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, cleanI love when you stare at me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean

[Verse 2: Big Boi]
Canary yellow seven-nine Seville is on display
My n***a Bongo hooked it up, Omar gon’ dip my rims today
So a n***a can ride out to the Honeycomb Hideout
I’mma show you how to wild out like Jack Tripper
Let me be bambino on your snipples
YKK on your zipper, lick you like a lizard when I’m slizzard

Or sober, six million ways to fold ya
Like Noah’s, I get two’s of youse and you get pretty ‘D’
But I’ll call yo’ ass ’round eight-ish, I know you’ll be there for me, girl

[Hook: André 3000]
Ain’t nobody dope as me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean

Don’t you think I’m so sexy? I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean

Ain’t nobody dope as me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean

I love when you stare at me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean

[Verse 3: André 3000]
Those huge baby eyes, get to runnin’ off at they mouth

And tellin’ me everything that’s on your nasty mind
They say you’re malnutritioned, in need of vitamin D
And invitin’ me to that tingle in your spine
I love who you are, I love who you ain’t — you’re so Anne Frank

Let’s hit the attic to hide out for ’bout two weeks
Rick James’n, no chains and whips
I do suck lips ’til hips jerk in double time

The boy next door’s a freak, ha-ha!

[Hook: André 3000]
Ain’t nobody dope as me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean

Don’t you think I’m so sexy? I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean

Ain’t nobody dope as me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean

I love when you stare at me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean

[Bridge: André 3000]
And we are… The coolest motherfunkers on the planet
And my, my… The sky is fallin’, ain’t no need to panic
But ooh ooh… I got a stick and want yo’ automatic
Ooh, ooh, ooh… Compatible, created in the attic
And we are… The coolest motherfunkers on the planet
And my my… The sky is fallin’, ain’t no need to panic
But ooh, ooh… I got a stick and want yo’ automatic
Ooh, ooh, ooh… Compatible, created in the attic

[Hook: André 3000]
Ain’t nobody dope as me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean

Don’t you think I’m so sexy? I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean
Ain’t nobody dope as me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean

I love when you stare at me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean
Ain’t nobody dope as me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean

Don’t you think I’m so sexy? I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean
Ain’t nobody dope as me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean

I love when you stare at me; I’m dressed so fresh, so clean
So fresh and so clean, clean

Copied from: https://genius.com/Outkast-so-fresh-so-clean-lyrics

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Wishing you Transformation and Healing,

-V.

Stream of Consciousness Reflections…Psychic Cords

6 Aug

Aloha.

I came across this article on the internet about psychic cords. It proposes that we are connected psychically through these cords and we stay connected even if a relationship ends. The relevant quote from the article says:

…”It doesn’t matter if you were the person who walked away or if someone else left you, a loss is felt either way. It is especially painful if a relationship ends without closure. Unfortunately, often times when people “breakup” what they don’t realize is that they may very well still have cords attached…”

I am not sure if everything this quote proposes is true- especially about both parties feeling the loss. Someone that leaves their partner for someone else or simply wants the relationship to end may not feel any loss- not at all like the abandoned and rejected party does.

It can be painful when a relationship ends without closure. This part is obvious because at least one of the two people is left in the dark wondering what they think they did wrong or how they didn’t measure up. Luckily, you can always try to find closure on your own and cut the psychic cord to start a new chapter in your life. That ending can lead to a new beginning with someone that truly deserves you. 

Can we be psychically attached to someone? I think so.

What about you?

The X Files Telepathic Communication

Agent Mulder from The X-Files


Please enjoy…To You Alone by The Beta Band

{I love the line,

A black box inside my mind
Records the time we spent together.”

It truly is genius to think of our memories stored on a black box just like the black box on an air plane that records the flight.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CPzeHM9fsww

Live Version…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KEiurCeu9lc

“If you could look at me from above my feet
I’ll have you back in time for me, don’t look back for me
There’s not a lottery for you in there
Guitar in hand, hold it like a song man

You do not realise the line that runs from me

Too glad to visualise the lie line that runs from me

I’m sending out, I’m sadder now
Before the sky will fall on yer, who’s calling yer
A black box inside my mind
Records the time we spent together

You do not realise the line that runs from me
Across the universe to you alone
The universe, are you alone
Are you alone
Are you alone
Are you alone
Are you alone
I’m a-singin like a fool
I’m a-singin like a fool
I’m a-singin like a fool
I’m a-singin like a fool

She’s like the snow-capped trees in my jigsaw
Lose at the seams within fear of your dreams
She’s like a fool you meet at the hot store
Hand in the pale, and the blacker the veil
The blacker the veil

I’m a-singin like a fool
I’m a-singin like a fool
I’m a-singin like a fool
I’m a-singin like a fool

I’m sending out, I’m sadder now
Before the sky will fall on yer, who’s calling yer
A black box inside my mind
Records the time we spent together

You do not realise the line that runs from me
Across the universe to you alone
Are you alone
Are you alone
Are you alone
Are you alone
Are you alone
Are you alone
I’m a-singin like a fool.”

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For more information…

The Beta Band…https://www.facebook.com/thebetas

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Peace & Psychic Love…

Reflection for today…No Truth Can Cure Grief -Haruki Murakami

31 May

“No truth can cure the sorrow we feel from losing a loved one.

No truth, no sincerity, no strength, no kindness can cure that sorrow.

All we can do is see it through to the end and learn something from it, but what we learn will be no help in facing the next sorrow that comes to us without warning.” 
Haruki Murakami,   

Norwegian Wood

Crying Angel

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In this short video clip, Eric Clapton discusses Jim Hendrix’s death.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j082opb4AZo

http://youtu.be/j082opb4AZo

Eric Clapton about Jimi Hendrix death

It is painfully obvious that Eric is deeply mourning Jimi. Their friendship had a sacred place in his life. It was a friendship based on mutual respect and admiration. It was a friendship of equals.

Jimi Hendrix & Eric Clapton in 1967

Eric is overcome with a tidal wave of melancholy while speaking about Jimi. A sense of anger is also present in his voice. Perhaps it is the sense of hopelessness over what happened. The sad truth is that no matter how much we love someone, we cannot save them from anything- especially from death.

Death tries to steal our greatest loves from us.

Death is the greatest thief.

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Eric speaks about the feelings of abandonment he felt when Jimi died, “a lonely feeling to be left alone.” This comment reminds me of how death affects the loved ones left behind. Somehow they have to be resilient in order to continue on with their lives despite their pain and grief. The hole in one’s heart is left there forever. Time is irrelevant in grief. I really admire people for their strength in being able to live their lives despite their grief, suffering and losses. They truly have my utmost respect.

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Eric’s story about the birthday gift he bought for Jimi was so heartfelt. He bought him a left-handed Fender stratocaster guitar but due to circumstances, he was unable to give it to him that night. Unfortunately, he was never able to give it Jimi because he died. Eric notes, “The next day, wack, he was gone and I was left with that left-handed stratocaster.” When he looks at the interviewer it looks like he is holding back tears. You can see the pain in his eyes- in his soul.

It is so tragic when loved ones are taken from us. I recently lost someone and no matter how many times it has happened, you are never ready for it. You are always left broken, bloody, bruised, raw and spiritually naked. Grieving takes a lot out of you- especially if you are a sensitive soul like myself. This is the reason why I have been away so long from this blog. I needed some time to reflect and grieve on my own. Hopefully I can reflect with you all now. If you are still here, thank you for still being here. Thank you for reading.

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For more information…

Jimi Hendrix…http://www.jimihendrix.com/us/home

Eric Clapton…http://www.ericclapton.com/

Fender Guitars…http://www.fender.com/en-CA/

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Jimi Hendrix & Eric Clapton

In true friendship, we give the best of ourselves to our friend. We give our respect, loyalty and compassion.

Peace & Namaste…

Reflection for today…All I Want In This World Is You -Haruki Murakami

29 Jan

“I have a million things to talk to you about.

All I want in this world is you.

I want to see you and talk.

I want the two of us to begin everything from the beginning.” 
Haruki Murakami,   

Norwegian Wood

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Please enjoy All I Need by Radiohead…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z9IODJdi3GA

Radiohead – All I Need [live From the Basement]

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Radiohead came to be my favourite band out of all the many bands/artists that I love.

I simply adore them.

My faith in humanity, life and love is restored when I listen to them.

When I watch this video, I am reminded of how much musicians and artists are so necessary in this world. They are vital because they are alchemists who can transform pain and suffering into beauty and enlightenment.

They are also healers that greatly contribute to the healing of the world. 

I have a great reverence for musicians and artists.

They are doctors of the heart and soul.

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For more information…

Haruki Murakami…http://www.murakami.ch/main_3.html 

http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/3354.Haruki_Murakami

Radiohead…http://www.radiohead.com/

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Peace & Cosmic Love…

Reflection for today…The Ocean of Consciousness -Rumi…

18 Oct

Rumi You Are The Ocean In An Entire Drop

I remember reading some Buddhist teachings many moons ago that spoke about the ocean of consciousness.

It spoke about each of us being a wave in the ocean.

We think that we are completely independent; that we are a single wave because of the illusion of our ego.

Our ego clouds and distorts our perception creating a false sense of self.

It is complicated as in Western society there is so much focus on the self: self-improvement, self-esteem, self-confidence, self-doubt, etc.

The truth is that while it may seem that we are individual waves,

we are actually part of the ocean; the ocean of humanity.

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I really cannot understand how some people can have no compassion for each other.

At the root of this poverty of the spirit is a lack of compassion for the self, selfishness and an overindulgence of the ego.

{One cannot offer compassion if you have no compassion for yourself}.

As I said to my friend, if we don’t help each other then we will all sink.

I know that we all have our individual problems but if we just focus on them, then we cannot get out of our heads and the prison of selfishness.

There is a delicate balance between having compassion and helping others with helping yourself and protecting yourself from harm. Boundaries are necessary.

I always struggle with how to have compassion while not losing myself.

The sad truth is that many people mistake kindness for weakness.

The truth is that it takes great strength to be compassionate in this world.

It takes great spiritual strength to open your heart and mind to offer your compassion. 

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 When the triple disasters were taking place in Japan in 2011, I was horrified. I was watching the news on the internet. I constantly watched BBC, CBC and Al Jazeera with tears in my eyes.

I could not help crying as I watched the news.

It hurt my heart and soul to witness such suffering.

I could not believe that on top of the tsunami and the earthquake there was a nuclear situation as well. As I thought of Fukushima, I was reminded of the Chernobyl nuclear disaster. I was very concerned and afraid for Japan. I still am.

While I had no family, friends or loved ones in Japan, I felt deep compassion for the Japanese.

It didn’t matter in the least if I didn’t know a single soul in Japan.

We are all interconnected and if Japan was suffering and grieving then we all were.

I still think of Japan and how the triple disasters affected and affect people today- especially the effects of nuclear contamination/radiation.

The reason that I share this is because I had an epiphany then.

My good friend and I were having coffee one day {during the disasters in 2011}.

I was telling him about what was happening in Japan.

He stopped me in the middle of my sentence and said very coldly, “you know what…I just don’t care.”

That is when I realized that something inside of him died.

To be honest, I was very disturbed by his comment and his attitude.

Upon deep reflection, I felt sadness and compassion for him.

He had just gone through a very painful and dark time with the illness of his mother. I know that this experience had a very damaging effect on him.

I think he was most likely spiritually disconnected and emotionally numb at that point.

He probably had nothing left to give as he was in desperate need of healing.

*

Compassion is the greatest gift you can offer someone.

Compassion is what makes us truly human.

Our humanity is rooted in compassion.

*Remember that we are all in this life together.

We all depend on each other.

We are all interdependent as waves in the ocean of humanity.

*

Please enjoy Ocean by Azam Ali and Loga Ramin Torkian as I felt it complimented this post.

It is from Azam Ali’s album: “Lamentation of Swans: A Journey Towards Silence.”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3558lJuA8Y8

*

To learn more about Azam Ali, Loga Ramin Torkian and Niyaz…

http://www.niyazmusic.com/

Here is a brief description that I copied and pasted from their biography.

From this link: http://www.niyazmusic.com/#!/biography/

Niyaz, which means ‘yearning’ in Persian and Urdu, was formed in 2005 by Azam Ali, multi-instrumentalist Loga Ramin Torkian and two-time Grammy nominated producer and electronic musician Carmen Rizzo.

The band borrows from an historic lineage of Middle Eastern poets setting verse to music, perhaps most famously known today through the work of the 13th century Persian poet Rumi and the endless barrage of quotes attributed to him on Twitter and Facebook.

While the immediate goal of Niyaz was to explore the music and identity of Iranians living in exile and struggling to maintain their cultural identity in the modern world on their first two acclaimed records, Niyaz and Nine Heavens, the band has expanded that theme with Sumud.”

*

Azam Ali is the singer with the heavenly voice in Niyaz.

Azam AliHer voice is truly “otherworldly” and hauntingly beautiful.

Azim Ali Otherworldly

She has also been a part of another band named VAS. Their albums include: Sunyata (1997), Offerings (1998), In the Garden of Souls (2000) and Feast of Silence (2004).

Azam has released seven albums between Niyaz and VAS.

Niyaz’s albums include: Niyaz (2005), Nine Heavens (2008) and Sumud (2012).

She has also released four solo albums: Portals of Grace (2002), Elysium for the Brave (2006), From Night to the Edge of Day (2011) and Lamentation of Swans- A Journey Towards Silence (2013).

Azam has also been involved in movie soundtracks (the movie 300) and video game soundtracks.

For more information, please visit her official website…

http://www.azamalimusic.com/main.php

*Much Love to Japan and the rest of the world.

My prayers are with Japan as they are facing another natural disaster in the form of a typhoon.

*

Peace & Namaste Friends…

Reflection for today…Cowards Run From Love -Bob Marley

18 Apr
“The biggest coward of a man is to awaken the love of a woman without the intention of loving her.”
*
I really love this quote.
The idea of awakening love in someone without loving them or intending to love them is so cruel and selfish yet it happens.
It is deceitful and disrespectful to use someone.
It should also be noted that a woman who awakens the love of a man without the intention of loving him is also a coward.
Same goes for everyone.
*
Please enjoy Waiting in Vain by Bob Marley & The Wailers…
*
For more information on Bob Marley,
please visit his official website…
*
Peace & Namaste…

Reflection for today…Tears Speak For Themselves -Paulo Coelho

5 Feb

Tears speak for themselves

by Paulo Coelho on February 2, 2013

Our great goal in life is to love.

The rest is silence.

We need to love. Even when it leads us to the land where the lakes are made of tears, to that secret, mysterious place, the land of tears!

Tears speak for themselves. And when we feel that we have cried all we needed to cry, they still continue to flow. But when we believe that our life is destined to be a long walk through the Vale of Sorrows, the tears suddenly vanish.

Because we managed to keep our heart open, despite the pain.

Because we realised that the person who left us did not take the sun with them or leave darkness in their place. They simply left, and with every farewell comes a hidden hope.

It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.”

taken from MANUSCRIPT FOUND IN ACCRA

*

Johnny Cash & June Carter: Eternal Lovers

To me Johnny Cash and June Carter illustrate what love is.

Someone that is home to your soul.

{More posts about their love in the future…}

*

Paulo Coelho manages to capture the essence of love.

“Our great goal in life is to love.

The rest is silence.”

Tears are cathartic.

They help us to cleanse and heal.

Paulo Coelho reminds us of the need to cry in order to heal and open our hearts again.

*

Here is a song that makes me cry…

Please enjoy Tragedy by Hayden.

Hayden is a soulful Canadian artist.

This achingly beautiful song is from his album Everything I Long For.

I highly recommend it.

I am so grateful that it was given to me as a gift.

What a gift it is to listen to it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2gZZMpmIzGA

“Broken bottle won’t hurt me
Nothing worse that I have dreamed
Gun shot in my chest you’ll leave
I can take that you will see
Late at night is when I dream
Horrible things are what I see
Hard for me to believe
I wake up and I won’t freeze
Car crash highway tragedy
Nothing worse than I have dreamed
Loss of my best friend I grieve
I can take that you will see.”

*

For more information…

 Paulo Coelho… http://paulocoelho.com/

Hayden…http://wasteyourdaysaway.com/

Johnny Cash…http://www.johnnycash.com/

*

Do you agree with Paulo Coelho?

I would love to hear your thoughts.

Peace & Namaste…

Reflection for today…Life Hurts More Than Death -Jim Morrison

1 Sep

People fear death even more than pain.

It’s strange that they fear death.

Life hurts a lot more than death.

At the point of death, the pain is over.

Yeah, I guess it is a friend.”

Jim Morrison

*

I just had to include one of my favourite songs by The Doors as it is relevant.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lofF2p0_cJs

“This is the end
My only friend, the end
Of our elaborate plans, the end
Of everything that stands, the end
No safety or surprise, the end
I’ll never look into your eyes…again…”

-The Doors, The End

*

Do you agree with Jim?

Why or why not?

*

For more information on Jim Morrison and his band The Doors,

please visit:

http://www.thedoors.com/index.php

Peace & Namaste…

Gabriel Byrne Discusses The Abyss of Depression & Alcoholism…

11 Aug

Gabriel Byrne discusses depression and alcoholism in an interview on Irish television channel RTÉ

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g51AcR8Et-g

It really is an excellent interview from a show is called The Meaning of Life.

To watch the full interview, please click here: http://archive.org/embed/GabrielByrne-TheMeaningOfLifeWithGayByrne

You can also click on this link Gabriel Byrne Meaning of Life Interview. Then click on the January 17, 2010 The Meaning of Life with Gay Byrne interview.

http://www.rte.ie/tv/meaningoflife/s2p1.html Gabriel Byrne The Meaning of Life

GabrielByrne-TheMeaningOfLifeWithGayByrne

{I apologize but I was unable to embed or send this video as those options were not available. If you could help me to embed this video from the internet archive, then I would be ever so grateful}.

I copied and pasted the description of the interview from the show’s web site:

“…The basis for a searching interview, in which Gabriel talks engagingly and openly about his life: his decision to enter a UK seminary at the age of eleven; his experiences of clerical sexual abuse; his reasons for giving up on any idea of priesthood and his search for another vocation, which found fulfilment in acting; his relationships with the two key women in his life, Aine O’Connor and Ellen Barkinhis on-going struggle with twin demons – alcoholism and depression – in which he knows he is far from alone in this country; and the reason he thinks so much about death.”

 *

Gabriel says that alcoholism and depression are seen as moral failings– as if something is wrong with the person for being “weak” or “not good enough.” These feelings of inadequacy have probably existed before. They only become exacerbated with drinking and by the judgment of others.

***Alcohol only adds fuel to the fire.***

He also notes that alcoholism and depression are often intertwined; hence the “twin demons” reference. They are so inextricably linked that I wonder how one can be divorced from the other. I don’t believe that they can- especially since alcoholism is a depressant. People drink to get out of depression. The more they drink, the more depressed they become; hence, the vicious and self-destructive cycle continues.

Gabriel says that, “Part of the disease of alcoholism is removing yourself from reality as quickly as possible.” Essentially he is describing an emotional disconnection, spiritual disconnection- numbness.  He describes binge drinking as a plague because people emotionally disconnect from themselves, from others and from life. 

I think it is vital for people to be honest about depression and addiction {in any form}. Awareness and honesty is what will give them insight. Courage will allow them to look in the mirror and take the first step on the path to healing.

Then people can start to fight their demons.

I pray that they win.

*People suffering from any addiction or illness need our compassion.

{You never know if your compassion can give them strength to battle their demons and to heal}.

*

For more information on Gabriel Byrne,

please visit…Byrneholics.

*

Peace & Namaste…

Reflection for today…The Price of Love -Bob Marley

25 Jul

 “Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you,

you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.”

Bob Marley

Who is worth suffering for?

Conversely, why would someone who loves you make you suffer?

*

Peace & Namaste…

Passin’ Me By- The Pharcyde

8 Apr

Who is Passing You By???
Passin Me By Upside Down PicOr Who Are You Passing By???

I Love The Pharcyde
 
Pharcyde Group Pic
 Passin’ Me By is a True Hip Hop Classic…





Bizarre Ride II the Pharcyde is a Classic Hip Hop Album…so original, creative and fresh.
Pharcyde Bizzare Ride To The Pharcyde
 Its still all love after all these years…
 

 The Pharcyde – Passin’ Me by Lyrics

“Now in my younger days I used to sport a shag
When I went to school I carried lunch in a bag
With an apple for my teacher cause I knew I’d get a kiss
Always got mad when the class was dismissed
But when it was in session, I always had a question
I would raise my hand to make her stand, come to my desk and
Help me with my problem, it was never much
Just a trick, to smell her scent and try to sneak a touch
Oh, how I wish I could hold her hand and give her a hug
She was married to the man, he was a thug
His name was Lee, he drove a Z
He’d pick her up from school promptly at three o’clock
I was on her jock, yes indeedy I wrote graffiti on the bus
First I’d write her name then carve a plus
With my name last, on the looking glass
I seen her yesterday but still I had to let her pass
She keeps on passin’ me by…

When I dream of fairytales I think of me and Shelly
See she’s my type of hype and I can’t stand when brothers tell me
 That I should quit chasin’ and look for somethin’ better
But the smile that she shows makes me a go-getter
I haven’t gone as far as asking if I could get with her
I just play it by ear and hope she gets the picture
I’m shootin’ for her heart, got my finger on the trigger
 She could be my broad, and I could be her nigg*
But, all I can do is stare
Back as kids we used to kiss when we played truth or dare
Now she’s more sophisticated, highly edu-ma-cated
Not at all over-rated, I think I need a prayer
To get in her boots and it looks rather dry
I guess a twinkle in her eye is just a twinkle in her eye
Although she’s crazy steppin’, I’ll try to stop her stride
Cause I won’t have no more of this passin’ me by…

Time for me to voice my opinion of not even pretendin she didn’t have me
Strung like a chicken, chase my tail like a doggie
She was kind of like a star, thinking I was like a fan
Dude, she looked good, down side: she had a man

 He was a rooty-toot, a nincompoop
She told me soon your little birdie’s gonna fly the coop
She was a flake like corn, and I was born not to understand
By lettin’ her pass I had proved to be a better man

She keeps on passin’ me by…

Now there she goes again, the dopest Ethiopian
And now the world around me be gets movin in slow motion
When-ever she happens to walk by – why does the apple of my eye
Overlook and disregard my feelings no matter how much I try?

 Wait, no, I did not really pursue my little princess with persistance;
And I was so low-key that she was unaware of my existence
From a distance I desired, secretly admired her;
Wired her a letter to get her, and it went:
My dear, my dear, my dear, you do not know me but I know you very well
Now let me tell you about the feelings I have for you
When I try, or make some sort of attempt, I symp
Damn I wish I wasn’t such a wimp
Cause then I would let you know that I love you so
And if I was your man then I would be true
The only lyin’ I would do is in the bed with you
Then I signed sincerely, the one who loves you dearly, PS Love Me Tender
The letter came back three days later: Return to Sender, damn
She keeps on passin’ me by…”

*

For more information on The Pharcyde,

please visit their official website…

http://thepharcyde.com/

*

Peace & Namaste…

Somebody That I Used To Know -Gotye featuring Kimbra

16 Feb

We all have somebody that we “used to know.”
That person from a past life that is now a ghost.
{Once so intimate, now so distant}.
Previously best friends and lovers, now old flames and strangers.

I’ve always wondered what kind of mathematics turns friends & lovers into strangers?


Is it time? Distance? Pain? Anger? Disappointment? Betrayal?
Worst of all: indifference?

*

*I Love Gotye‘s Music & Videos!!!
He {Gotye/Wally de Backer} is so creative and talented.

Gotye sings this song with so much passion.

You can see it in his eyes.

Most likely this song comes out of life experience- like some great art does.

To learn more about this Australian musical genius, please click on this link:
 http://www.gotye.com/

**********************************************
Somebody That I Used To Know lyrics

Now and then I think of when we were together
Like when you said you felt so happy you could die
Told myself that you were right for me
But felt so lonely in your company
But that was love and it’s an ache I still remember

You can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness
Like resignation to the end
Always the end
So when we found that we could not make sense
Well you said that we would still be friends
But I’ll admit that I was glad that it was over

But you didn’t have to cut me off
Make out like it never happened
And that we were nothing

And I don’t even need your love
But you treat me like a stranger
And that feels so rough
You didn’t have to stoop so low
Have your friends collect your records
And then change your number
I guess that I don’t need that though
Now you’re just somebody that I used to know

Now and then I think of all the times you screwed me over
But had me believing it was always something that I’d done

And I don’t wanna live that way
Reading into every word you say
You said that you could let it go
And I wouldn’t catch you hung up on somebody that you used to know…

But you didn’t have to cut me off
Make out like it never happened
And that we were nothing

And I don’t even need your love
But you treat me like a stranger
And that feels so rough
You didn’t have to stoop so low
Have your friends collect your records
And then change your number
I guess that I don’t need that though
Now you’re just somebody that I used to know

I used to know
That I used to know

Somebody…
*************

Peace & Namaste…