Tag Archives: Intimacy

Stream of Consciousness Reflections…Summer Loving…

31 Jul

Aloha.

How is your summer unfolding?

Summer is definitely my favourite season. It is the season I was born in and it is also the season when I feel the most alive. I love to see people enjoying the beautiful weather. I love to soak up the sun and be outside as much as I can. The only tragedy is that summer doesn’t last long {where I live}.

{Note to self: move to a place that has a tropical climate}.

What does summer make you feel like? It makes me feel like this Dee Lite song: Groove is in the Heart. {I haven’t tried out the dance moves in the video yet}.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=etviGf1uWlg

  

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One night I was on a moonlight walk and I saw something that was so romantic and lovely. A couple was going to sit on a bench and I noticed that he was carrying a guitar. When they sat down, he started playing for her. I felt like I was intruding on their intimate moonlight guitar session so I left. In my mind, it would be such a soulful way to spend a summer night.

When you are with someone you love and loves you in return, everything is magical.

I am working on some posts right now. Specifically, I am getting ready to work on some “health is wealth” posts where I will be discussing health topics and my fitness inspirations. There are so many things I want to work on. Hopefully these posts will manifest in time.

Peace & Love…

yoga peace

Reflection for today…Love Grows in Secret -Pablo Neruda

12 Feb

“I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret,

between the shadow and the soul. ” 

Pablo Neruda

There needs to be intimacy for love to grow…

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Please enjoy My Secret Friend By IAMX & Imogen Heap…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-jMWzfj9gM

{I am seriously in love with this song.

IAMX/Chris Corner and Imogen Heap are magic}.

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For more information…

Pablo Neruda…http://www.poetryfoundation.org/bio/pablo-neruda

IAMX…http://www.iamx.eu/

Imogen Heap…http://www.imogenheap.com/

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Peace & Namaste…

Reflection for today…Pain is Meant To Wake Us Up- Jim Morrison

8 Dec

People are afraid of themselves, of their own reality;

their feelings most of all.

People talk about how great love is, but that’s bullshit.

Love hurts.

Feelings are disturbing.

People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous.

How can they deal with love if they’re afraid to feel?

Pain is meant to wake us up.

People try to hide their pain. But they’re wrong.

Pain is something to carry, like a radio.

You feel your strength in the experience of pain.

It’s all in how you carry it.

That’s what matters. Pain is a feeling.

Your feelings are a part of you. Your own reality.

If you feel ashamed of them, and hide them, you’re letting society destroy your reality.

You should stand up for your right to feel your pain.”

Jim Morrison

{These pictures will be featured on an up-coming post discussing the social construction of masculinity and subversive crying}.

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Today is Jim Morrison’s birthday.

Happy Birthday Jim!

You always lit our intellectual and creative fires.

Reflection for today…The Capacity To Be Alone Is The Capacity To Love -Osho

17 Aug

 

“The capacity to be alone is the capacity to love. 
It may look paradoxical to you, but it is not. 
 
It is an existential truth: 
only those people who are capable of being alone are capable of love, 
of sharing, of going into the deepest core of the other person – 
without possessing the other, without becoming dependent on the other, 
without reducing the other to a thing, and without becoming addicted to the other. 
 
They allow the other absolute freedom, 
because they know that if the other leaves, 
they will be as happy as they are now. 
Their happiness cannot be taken by the other, 
because it is not given by the other.”
 –Osho

 

Reflection for today…Go Deeper -D.H. Lawrence

1 Aug

Go deeper than love, for the soul has greater depths,

love is like the grass,
but the heart is deep wild rock
molten, yet dense and permanent.
Go down to your deep old heart,
and lose sight of yourself.
And lose sight of me,
the me whom you turbulently loved.
Let us lose sight of ourselves,
and break the mirrors.
For the fierce curve of our lives is moving again to the depths
out of sight,
in the deep living heart.”
-D.H Lawrence

Break Me Gently…Honesty Breaks Down Walls in High Fidelity

14 Jul

News | How Erykah Badu Broke it Off With Rapper Common! | Singersroom

The reason that I decided to share this is because I wanted to briefly discuss break-ups.

I really respect how Erykah Badu was so honest with Common.

Although it hurt him to tell him the truth about her change of heart, in the end it was better for Common. 

He grew and learned from the experience.

It was his first love and first heart-break. Now he says that he and Erykah are “cool” again.

Why couldn’t everyone be so honest in regards to break-ups?

Imagine if someone told you the truth instead of a cheap, prostituted line…

“It’s not you, it’s me.” 

*Who really believes that anyway? Come on, please. Don’t even…

If people were more honest about why they really want to leave their significant other, then perhaps the other person would learn so much more and have better closure.

Perhaps this communication could break down some walls and infuse some new life in the old friendship and romance.

Who knows, perhaps this new-found honesty might create some new-found intimacy and the break-up might even be avoided.

Perhaps things fall apart to come together…

Perhaps I am dreaming of a utopian vision of reality because I know that most of the time things just fall apart.

{I know that relationships and break-ups especially are more complicated than this post describes}.

Regardless, if a couple has to part ways, it would be ideal if they each respected each other enough to really be honest with each other.

By not telling someone the truth, you are potentially taking away opportunities for growth. 

You are also really damaging their self-esteem, self-worth and confidence because they are left to wonder what is wrong with them.

They can only think that something is inherently wrong with themselves..

How else can they know what they did wrong if you don’t tell them? How else can they improve, learn, grow and change?

Thankfully one can still do some self-reflection in order to find healing, growth and closure on your own. 

You can learn from your mistakes.

*Of course your learning, growth and healing is not the other person’s responsibility.

{That is not at all what I am saying. Your learning, growth and healing is always your responsibility.

It would be so helpful to get that honesty, respect and communication from the person that once claimed to love and care about you}.

If both are ready and willing to battle their egos, then perhaps they can truly listen, share and learn.

At least both can learn what they did wrong from the mutual constructive criticism and feedback.

They will know why the other is jumping ship instead of just being left out in the cold  {or the rain} all alone.

Leaving someone guessing is just too cruel to do to someone’s heart, mind, life and soul- especially to someone who you used to like, love or at least be attracted to. This only further hurts someone that loved and adored you.

Don’t they deserve better from you?

{Leaving crumbs of false hope is an even more heartless thing to do to someone. Giving someone false hope so selfishly makes it painful for them to move on and to heal}. 

No one deserves to over-analyze and be haunted by what they possibly could have done wrong.They deserve better and if you are the dumped person, then so do you.

{Of course there always are exceptions and sadly not every break-up is amicable}.

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P.s. I highly recommend watching the movie High Fidelity (where most of the pictures from this post are from).

It is an excellent movie and my favourite break-up movie of all time next to Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind}. 

Plus I adore John Cusack.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=seSLhjX4uA0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LxDMzbxPQx8&feature=relmfu

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rmmq2ozbIFY&feature=relmfu

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=puOQuQI83lw&feature=relmfu

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J2oP8YO7F5A&feature=relmfu

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-dRiD-giCTc&feature=relmfu

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jeL32rVtvic&feature=relmfu

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hmk12K5dFno&feature=relmfu

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QZ1vNa-fzX0&feature=fvwrel

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5b9rbDeE9ZE&feature=fvwrel

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I also recommend a song that I love called “Break Me Gently” by Doves.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jHtNGaaXSqs

It was part of the inspiration for this post {along with High Fidelity}.

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The learn more about Doves, please click here:

http://www.doves.net/

Love is Just A Bloodsport…Sneaker Pimps

20 Jun

There is something about listening to Sneaker Pimp’s Bloodsport that does something to me.

Chris Corner‘s angelic and seductive voice is so hypnotic.

The thesis of the song is that, “love is just a blood sport.”

Almost every one of us has been in a romantic situation where we have felt like we have gotten beat up emotionally, spiritually, psychologically and metaphorically; hence the bloodsport analogy.

{Other times perhaps we may have been the one instigating the fight}.

It seems as though when you become vulnerable, many times you are hurt.

One thing that I say all the time is that people often mistake kindness for weakness.

In this case, people can mistake love for foolishness and weakness.

For this reason, people tend to put up walls, put on masks and have knives up their sleeves to protect themselves from getting hurt. These same walls that protect you can eventually become a prison so you become mindful of how thick your walls are and of who you allow in.

It reminds me of one of my favourite Rumi quotes. {I have had this as my email signature for years and it is still there}.

“Your task is not to seek for love,

but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself

that you have built against it.”

-Rumi

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So one day you let the walls down and let someone in…

It is so beautiful when love is intimate, passionate, gentle and kind.

This is the utopian version of love- a compassionate union of souls; the type of love that Rumi wrote poems about- friendship set on fire- intimacy at its most pure, most spiritual and its best.

What are you but my spiritual reflection?

The truth is that as much as all of us want that type of love, we don’t always find it because it is so elusive and rare.

Most are not ready or brave enough for true intimacy- to open one’s soul to another- to be spiritually naked without any armour…to risk really getting hurt while loving.

As a friend always used to say,

“If you risk nothing,

you risk everything.”

The question is…are you willling to risk everything?

Love isn’t a bloodsport.

Bloodsport Lyrics:

I want to be a kid again
Come down having Sunday best
See me staying home bunking school
Knowing wrong from right just rules

I wish I’d never seen your face
Better done wonder phase
I need an echo, not your praise
Straying from the god you nailed

My mother, my mother, my mother never told
My mother, my mother, my mother never told me
Love is just a bloodsport
Love is just a bloodsport

‘Cause love is just a bloodsport
Love is just a bloodsport

Sex and love is not a game
A game is something you can win
Maybe something kind of fun
‘Cause love is just a bloodsport, son

My mother, my mother, my mother never told
My mother, my mother, my mother never told me

Never told me
Never told me

‘Cause love is just a bloodsport
Love is just a bloodsport
‘Cause love is just a bloodsport
Love is just a bloodsport

‘Cause love is just a bloodsport
Love is just a bloodsport
‘Cause love is just a bloodsport
Love is just a bloodsport

“Bloodsport” as written by Steve Strange, Rusty Egan, Billy Currie, Midge Ure, John Mcgeogh, David Tomlinson, Barry Adamson, Liam Coverdale-howe,, Chris Corner, Ian Pickering
Lyrics © Warner/Chappell Music, Inc., Universal Music Publishing Group, EMI Music Publishing

Somebody That I Used To Know -Gotye featuring Kimbra

16 Feb

We all have somebody that we “used to know.”
That person from a past life that is now a ghost.
{Once so intimate, now so distant}.
Previously best friends and lovers, now old flames and strangers.

I’ve always wondered what kind of mathematics turns friends & lovers into strangers?


Is it time? Distance? Pain? Anger? Disappointment? Betrayal?
Worst of all: indifference?

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*I Love Gotye‘s Music & Videos!!!
He {Gotye/Wally de Backer} is so creative and talented.

Gotye sings this song with so much passion.

You can see it in his eyes.

Most likely this song comes out of life experience- like some great art does.

To learn more about this Australian musical genius, please click on this link:
 http://www.gotye.com/

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Somebody That I Used To Know lyrics

Now and then I think of when we were together
Like when you said you felt so happy you could die
Told myself that you were right for me
But felt so lonely in your company
But that was love and it’s an ache I still remember

You can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness
Like resignation to the end
Always the end
So when we found that we could not make sense
Well you said that we would still be friends
But I’ll admit that I was glad that it was over

But you didn’t have to cut me off
Make out like it never happened
And that we were nothing

And I don’t even need your love
But you treat me like a stranger
And that feels so rough
You didn’t have to stoop so low
Have your friends collect your records
And then change your number
I guess that I don’t need that though
Now you’re just somebody that I used to know

Now and then I think of all the times you screwed me over
But had me believing it was always something that I’d done

And I don’t wanna live that way
Reading into every word you say
You said that you could let it go
And I wouldn’t catch you hung up on somebody that you used to know…

But you didn’t have to cut me off
Make out like it never happened
And that we were nothing

And I don’t even need your love
But you treat me like a stranger
And that feels so rough
You didn’t have to stoop so low
Have your friends collect your records
And then change your number
I guess that I don’t need that though
Now you’re just somebody that I used to know

I used to know
That I used to know

Somebody…
*************

Peace & Namaste…

Reflection for Today…To Love At All Is To Be Vulnerable -C.S. Lewis‏

22 Jan

“To love at all is to be vulnerable.
Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung
and possibly be broken.

If you want to make sure of keeping it intact,
you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal.
Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries;
avoid all entanglements;
lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness.
But in that casket — safe, dark, motionless, airless — it will change.
It will not be broken;
it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.
The alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy,
is damnation.
 
The only place outside of Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell.

-C.S. Lewis
The Four Loves

Exotic beauty Sherilyn Fenn looks into your soul…

Can you really be vulnerable in order to love?

Can you really be spiritually naked and intimate with another’s soul?

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Peace & Namaste…